Love You Like I Did

Mood: Pensive/Sad
Song: Love You Like I Did

I hate that my blogs are turning into relationship type blogs but I going to blog what is on my mind currently. It took alot for me to post this. I am a very expressive person, but not necessarily out in public. I just got off the phone with my mother. I like to talk to her because she gives a great view on things. I was telling her about how everybody is getting married and having babies. She tells me, “Sista girl, you got plenty of time, plenty of time”. I am still young, but you know I still think about if I am ever going to get that. Once women hit their mid to late 20’s they start thinking about that despite the fact that they are focused on their career or just getting their life together. I personally don’t want to even have kids until I am in my thirties, but I want to be married first…and although my focus right now is to get myself together, it is still in the back of my head.

I ended a serious relationship earlier this year and I am dealing with it pretty well but I do have my off days or little moments when I am down. What I have experienced since my ex has me kind of discouraged sometimes though. Despite the fact that I try to be positive, sometimes I wonder if I will ever find anybody that loved me like he did. We were not perfect. We had our problems. We had our great times. We have learned from each other. But we were also young when we met. We have
grown a lot and I know that I have grown apart from him in many ways.

My family looks at him in a very high regard. But they don’t know everything. I dealt with more than I should have. There were times when I should have just left and avoided a lot of heartache. Times when I should have just let him go when he wanted to. But I didn’t and now I don’t feel like being there, the desire is not there. But I am still human. I still love him, I always will because what we shared was unconditional love.

One thing that I appreciate about him was the fact that despite the problems, he treated me well…which is why my family likes him. I admit he will be a great mate for whoever he is with when he settles down. I know he feels the same way about me…will he ever find someone who loved him the way I did.

Love is a complicated thing. It just seem like, when you meet guys…you meet bits and pieces of what you want. After a while, all the guys you meet equal the one man that you actually want…lol. I just want to meet a guy that just will enjoy my company and not look at me a just another chick to get in bed with. We can just go out (and when I mean out I mean not at the home) and just have fun together. Get to know each other. I guess time will tell.