Early Thursday Morning

So I am up early again. I am very pensive at the moment. I feel very unsettled...I guess unsettled about my life. There have been drastic changes on how I view many things. You know when you pretty much throw away not all but most of what you were taught and start new. When that happens, you realize that things that mattered to you are not important anymore. You find that your interests change...thoughts on your career paths change. I guess because you find yourself being real to what you really want in life. But in it brings confusion and fear. Confusion because what you thought was the path has changed and fear because you don't know what is to come. But what you are really fearing is fear within itself. I am currently getting my MS in Biology but now I feel like I should be overseas or doing something that requires me to move around. I feel like I should be learning more about the people, not just in the US but around the world. I have a interest in human motivation, behavior.I feel like I should be doing something that will be progessive for the world. I guess I am in the stages of figuring out what I truly want right now.

Ending my relationship earlier this year has shifted alot of things. I find that there has been alot of growth and progression. But then I guess on another level I feel like I am not necessarily stuck but not at a place where I think I should be. I know many people have their lists of what they want or don't want from a mate. Many people hoping and wishing that person will come into their life yesterday. I am human and for those who are big on astrology, I have strong Libra aspects in my birthchart. Libra Represents partnership. But I know that in order for me to be in any kind of "relatonship" with someone I have to be completely happy with myself. I have to be look at myself from the outside in and say, would I "date" myself. I say naw, and its not because I think lowly of myself...There is only one me and I happy that I am me...but I got to get my ish together. I say no because I am still trying to figure out who I am and what I am going to do. It takes alot to actually admit that but its truth.

So I was thinking about this and then I watch this video come on and I am like OMG. I love Trey Songz, the model was very lucky :). Shout out to all the natural hair girls of the world :).